So I apparently made a mistake in confiding in my roommate the knowledge that in the 2 1/2 years that I’ve lived in Las Vegas and attended the University 3rd Ward, which is now the Siena YSA Ward, I have yet to be asked to give a talk in church. She apparently felt that this was unacceptable, because she blabbed to the bishopric and now I’m stuck giving a talk in church next Sunday.
My calling in the ward is that of Publicity Committee Chair. I’m in charge of the ward directory and the programs. Well, the bishop has been harping on me to get the Directory done, and I don’t think that he realizes that that is a nearly impossible task. So I gave him a “good enough” (as supposed to a “finished”) directory. Well, he had a meeting with my roommate Thecla last Wednesday, because she is the Temple Co-Chair. Well, he asked her to remind me about the program. He also asked her to give a talk, but Jimmy (the Executive Secretary) reminded the bishop that she had just given a talk the previous week. Well, that meant that they have to find someone else to do it. “Hmmm, who can we get to give a talk? Oh, I know! Connie’s never talked in church!”
So, this afternoon, while I was in the chapel, right before Sacrament meeting started, (I had just gotten to the chapel, I was busy getting the program printed) the Bishop comes up to me and he says “I didn’t want to have to chase you down the hall.” I knew that he was trying to corner me into giving a talk, but I tried to deflect it, by handing him the directory. It didn’t work. He was all excited about the directory, but he didn’t forget about asking me to talk. He was like “It’s come to my attention that you need to speak in church. And I would like to ask you to speak next week.” At this, I looked him straight in the face and said, “No.” He was a little taken aback, and then said “The correct answer is: yes.” “No… *sigh* Okay, fine. What is the topic?” “I’ll tell you later.”
So first he asks me to speak, and then he doesn’t even tell me the topic?!? Just who does he think he is?!? The Bishop?!?
Well, I had to corner him after Gospel Doctrine to find out. Apparently he wants me to speak on “How Giving Service To Others Benefits You”
So the first thing that popped in to my head when he said this, is a line from an Avenue Q song “Helping others brings you closer to God” however the song would not exactly be appropriate to play during sacrament meeting, so I don’t know if I can work it in.